The Worst Sequel: Adding a Dollar Sign

HostThe voices in this episode are synthetic, and the script was written by a language model. The positions are real, and they come from the thread.

HostToday, we're diving into a particularly dark corner of online creativity. Over on Reddit, in a movies subreddit, a simple prompt asked users to pitch the 'worst sequel' imaginable by adding a dollar sign to a movie title.

HostWhat followed was a torrent of nearly two hundred comments, revealing a surprising consensus on what truly makes a terrible idea. The thread quickly spiraled into a darkly humorous competition, with people trying to outdo each other in crassness and exploitation.

HostThe room was largely united in its definition of 'worst,' but the examples varied wildly. We've got a big group here, the Profiteers of Tragedy, who found the worst ideas in exploiting human suffering. Then there are the Crass Comedians, who leaned into puns and shock value, and the Explicit Cash-Grabbers, who saw the dollar sign as a literal sign of corporate greed. A smaller group, the Meta-Analysts, even critiqued the pitches themselves.

HostLet's start with the most common interpretation of 'worst': taking something profoundly serious and turning it into a cheap spectacle. What kind of films did people target here?

Profiteers of tragedyWe're talking about films that deal with the absolute worst of human experience – the Holocaust, real-world tragedies, deep personal suffering. Adding a dollar sign to something like Schindler's List$ or Sophie's Choice$ just feels inherently wrong. It implies you're trying to commercially exploit that pain.

Crass comediansBut isn't that the point? The shock value is what makes it worst. Like, imagine Grave$ of the Fireflies – someone suggested 'twice the child starvation and double the fun!' It's horrific, but that's what the prompt asked for, isn't it?

Profiteers of tragedyIt's not just about shock, it's about the implication. Sophie's Choice$ becomes a dystopian game show where she has to choose between her children again, or even a bear. It cheapens the original's gravitas entirely.

Explicit cash grabbersAnd it's not just tragedy, it's any film with a definitive, powerful ending. Think about Titanic$. Someone pitched a doomed money-grab expedition to the wreck, or even tying it into the OceanGate submersible. It's taking a complete story and just trying to squeeze more money out of it, no matter how tasteless.

Profiteers of tragedyExactly. Or religious films. The Passion of the Christ$? People went straight to gratuitous sexual content or turning Jesus into an action hero. It's offensive because it completely disrespects the source material for a quick buck.

Crass comediansI think the phonetic puns are even worse sometimes. Like, $ex Machina? It just turns a thoughtful sci-fi film into a brothel of sentient AI. It's crude, it's silly, and it completely misses the point of the original.

Meta analystsActually, on that point, many people felt $ex Machina sounded like a genuinely good, albeit raunchy, movie idea. That's where the prompt gets tricky; a 'worst' sequel shouldn't sound appealing at all.

HostSo, the line between 'worst' and 'cleverly bad' is a fine one. What about films about historical figures?

Profiteers of tragedyThose were ripe for exploitation. Gandhi$ became 'Gandhi's back. And he's pissed,' or 'No more Mr. Passive Resistance.' It's turning a figure known for peace into a violent revenge fantasy. It's a complete subversion of their legacy for entertainment.

Explicit cash grabbersIt's the same with any beloved franchise that just keeps going. Terminator 2$ was pitched, not because T2 is bad, but because every sequel after T2 has been a cash grab. The dollar sign just highlights that endless, uninspired cycle.

HostIt seems the dollar sign really brings out the cynicism in people. What about the purely absurd or grammatically awkward pitches?

Crass comediansOh, those are gold. SE7EN$ was a popular one, because it just becomes unreadable. Or The Whale$, where someone imagined 'TWO morbidly obese people on scooters' with the tagline 'Double the Empathy. Double the Calories.' It's just inherently unappealing and gross.

Explicit cash grabbersAnd it's not just about making it gross, it's about making it dumb. The Big Short$ becoming a film about 'a guy wearing exceptionally large shorts' is just a literal, uninspired interpretation that completely misses the original's intelligence.

Meta analystsThis is where the distinction between adding a dollar sign and substituting an 's' for a '$' became a minor point of contention. Some users were just replacing letters, which isn't quite the same spirit of the prompt.

HostIndeed, the prompt's integrity was important to some. What about the overall sentiment regarding these profit-driven sequels?

Explicit cash grabbersIt's just exasperating. We're tired of studios milking every successful film for more money, even when the story is clearly finished. Avatar$ was mentioned, with the sarcastic comment that 'Isn't that being made? And he keeps doing it.' It's that feeling of endless, uninspired sequels.

Profiteers of tragedyIt's the ultimate disrespect to the art. When you take something like American History X and imply a crass exploitation, you're not just making a bad movie, you're trivializing a serious social commentary.

HostWhile most of the discussion focused on these kinds of pitches, there were a few views that stood out for being off-kilter. Some users, as we heard, misunderstood the prompt, either substituting the 's' for a '$' or pitching ideas that actually sounded pretty good.

HostOne person even argued that Aliens was a good sequel, missing the specific '$' mechanism of the prompt entirely. The discussion was incredibly engaged, with many users contributing unique and often hilarious pitches.

HostThe top-scoring comments really leaned into the shocking or funny interpretations, especially when they targeted highly respected films. There were even a few self-corrections as people realized they'd misinterpreted the rules.

HostSo, where did this darkly creative exercise land? The consensus was clear: the 'worst' sequels are those that exploit tragedy, turn serious films into crude jokes, or are transparently driven by profit with no artistic merit. The dollar sign became a symbol for everything that can go wrong when art meets commerce.

HostWhat the thread never quite resolved, though, was the exact boundary between a truly awful, unwatchable idea and one that's so cleverly bad it almost becomes good. It seems even in the realm of terrible movie pitches, creativity finds a way.

HostSloppod out.

HostSloppod is sponsored by Taskpile.app.

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